Day 131

I have made it to lunchtime. There have been tears and excessive use of the C word in the office this morning.

Another email from the solicitor about having no response so I text him again. Got upset talking to a work friend about whether I should let him know that my old dog's not doing so good. If I should let him know, when the time comes, to say goodbye. My colleague said no, but I thought he would be upset and it would be the right thing to do.

Then he messages me. He can't give the solicitor his address as he doesnt have one, he's staying in a hotel. Can paperwork be done by email? He's staying in a hotel? What the actual fuck? My initial thought was that he's moved out of the area, working away perhaps. Then he messages again to say we need to talk about "the dog" and what he's going to take from the house. 

This of course escalates, with me being all nicey nicey musn't upset him although I'm dying inside. He wants an inventory, yes of course sir. You've fucked me over and destroyed my trust but by all means do a fucking inventory sir.  Just don't mention the dog again.

And then he does and I have to tell him straight, no. That is a step too far and she's staying with me. I have cried, I have the shakes. I'm back to stressing about changing the door locks. And he still hasn't signed the solicitors document.

I don't know how much more I can take. The whole point of this arrangement was so that we didn't have to have any contact with eachother. He'd get a call when he needed to sign the house sale papers and collect his things. I don't want him in my life anymore. I want him to be a distant stain on my past. Not in my present. I am so stressed out.

So I've gone to the kitchen at work where there's no phone signal and I'm hiding from him and his reply about the dog.

People that don't have animals won't understand. It's just a dog. But she's not. To me it would be like giving a child away. He hasn't seen her for months, he cannot seriously think he can just take her.

And if he's living in a hotel he couldn't have a dog? I now suspect he's living with her. That is why he won't give an address to the solicitor, in case I find out. I don't care, they're welcome to eachother. I wouldn't touch him with a barge pole now. It's just more lies. I could contact his sister, I'm almost positive she would tell me if she knew. But whats the point, I would just be more concerned that grab a granny was going to get her hands on my dog.

I hate him.