Day 201

Crap crap crap day.

It all went downhill from the moment I got up at 5.10am when my lovely dog pissed on my bed. When I'm in such a rush with so much to do before work, this is not the shit I need to start my day with.

My house went for sale online last night. I came across it by chance, crap agents hadnt even told me. Today I got a call that 2 people wanted to view. Fantastic. Tomorrow. Not so great idiots I'm at work 20 miles from home, 2 dogs are in the house plus you don't have a key! Hence my request that all viewings be carried out at weekends. I snapped at the woman and was a little rude but she was able to rearrange one of the viewings for Saturday and the other people are going away on holiday so theyre not serious anyway!

Then this evening thick fog, pissing down with rain and 4 horses to sort out. Ive been on the go since 5am and just sat down at 8.45pm. I'm knackered. So toast for dinner while I wait for my bedding to dry so I can go and remake my bed with the clean duvet that had an emergency visit to the launderette today. I hate making the bed last thing at night.

Oh and the paperwork hasn't arrived from the solicitor yet!

Day 200

I can't believe I'm at day 200. The day I wished for so long ago. The day that would have me feeling good and happy with all the crap behind me.

Little did I know I'd still be living with his clothes in the wardrobe.

I am feeling good and happy to be fair. I no longer pine for him. The rose tinted memories are now perfectly black and white and I can see our relationship for what it was. Stale, lacking.

That still doesn't excuse his behaviour. Nothing does. Stale or not I still believed he was my best friend and my partner for life. I loved him.

Bastard.

So I've emailed the useless estate agent. Thanked him for advice but I'm sticking to the original plan and going for the price I want. If it doesn't work I can change it along with the estate agents who have pissed me off before it's even for sale.

The paperwork hasn't arrived from the solicitor. Please god don't let it have got lost in the post. If I have to go through it all again I'll be walking in front of a bus!

So onwards to day 201 and better things.

Day 199

I can't believe it's been 199 days since my heart was ripped out, spat on, run over, trampled on.... and lots of other expressions of pain.

It all feels so pointless. What a spineless excuse for a human being he was. Is.

Some days go by now and I don't think of him at all. The days that I do it's mostly angry or murderous thoughts!

I need to concentrate on getting this house sold. There's going to be more shit times coming my way as I have a lifetime of stuff to try and sort/pack/move by myself. Plus more paperwork to be signed by Mr unresponsive. But its good, I'm closer to the end of this nightmare each day.

Now to find somewhere affordable to live that meets all my requirements.  Oh look, a flying pig!

Day 198

The neighbours have sold their house in 3 days! 

So full steam ahead back to plan A, the estate agents can shove it if they don't agree.

On a less positive note I've fallen off the wagon and am now the proud owner of several bags of crisps.

Day 197

I'm just so bored of all the shit.  I can't wait for it all to be over.

I received the draft sales particulars for my house from the estate agents today. It looks pretty good but we had discussed an "offers over" price but it had been put down as a flat price. I queried this with the agents and also the price we are going for as this and the neighbours house have knocked my confidence.

The estate agent now tells me my price is expensive. A price £10k less would be "reasonably achievable" and that other properties on the street go for X,Y, Z.

For fucks sake can something go right for me just for bloody once. Every time I try and put a positive spin on something I get shot back down.

The figures he was spouting about previous sales were all wrong anyway, too low, and now I'm doubting everything. I think he's been put off by the neighbours house sale too and is back pedalling.

Of course he didn't reply to my next email.. what is it with these bloody men? Now I have to wait all weekend to hear from him again.

I'm so pissed off. I need to win the lottery and tell alot of people to fuck right off.

Day 196

Totally uneventful.

Boring day at work.

No drama.

More days like this please.

Day 195

I didn't hear from him checking if the paperwork arrived. I didn't contact him to tell him it had.

I woke up feeling fine, not stressed. What will be will be with the house sale. I would prefer the neighbour wasn't selling too but they may also be pissed off when mine goes for sale. Not alot I can do.

So a good day other than the £250 bill from the garage to get my car through the MOT. Thank god for overdrafts.